Wednesday, 2 June 2010

Baka-Raptor is the worst 'blog ever

If there's one thing I've learned from life, it's that if you can't beat them, you join them. If there's a second thing I've learned from life, it's that piss and vinegar will usually get you what you want. Thus, for the latest round of the Aniblog Tourney against Baka-Raptor, I've decided to take a different approach to my normal polite request for votes to combat his own "unique" style and content.

Actually, before I do that - Vote for Hanners' Anime 'Blog, you know you want to!

Now, if you're still unsure as to why you should vote for this 'blog and not Baka-Raptor, allow me to enlighten you...
  1. Baka-Raptor is a dinosaur, and as the latest batshit-insane research from Intelligent Design proponents will tell you, dinosaurs lived alongside humans. Not so cool now, are they?
  2. In fact, as The Flinstones will tell you, dinosaurs were used as cars by humans. Vinyl record players too. So, we can now agree that dinosaurs are in no way cool or awesome.
  3. Baka-Raptor's site was initially supposed to be called Baker-Raptor, but a typing error when registering the URL left it in its current state. I mean come on, Baker Raptor? What kind of a stupid name is that?
  4. This also meant that Baka-Raptor's pimp hat was actually going to be a chef's hat. A dinosaur. With a chef's hat. I rest my case.
  5. Baker Raptor's original intent was to be an online children's book about a friendly dinosaur who cooks cakes and biscuits for children and Asuza from K-ON!. Yawn....
  6. In the last round, I defeated ghostlightning. A ghost. Made of mother-fucking lightning. If that isn't more impressive than a dinosaur, I don't know what is.
  7. In his April 21st post, Baka-Raptor posits that "real men have sideburns". Dinosaurs cannot have sideburns. As admissions of defeat go, I'd say that's pretty comprehensive.
  8. There aren't any dinosaurs in Hidamari Sketch. Apart from that episode where there kind of is, but it's only Miyako's imagination so it doesn't count.
  9. There is kind of a dinosaur in K-ON!. Because turtles do count, and it isn't in anybody's imagination.
  10. PRINT "BAKA-RAPTOR SUCKS"
  11. GOTO 10
So, ladies and gentlemen, there you have it. I know you'll all do the right thing.

14 comments:

schneider said...

Shit, I chuckled at the GOTO...

This is tough.

Windaerie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Baka-Rapor said...

Actually, there are dinosaurs on Hidamri Sketch (even outside Blondie's imagination). There's no way anyone could miss it. This is concrete proof that you are an unscrupulous liar who will stop at nothing to win.

Windaerie said...

Oops, didn't mean to delete my comment. But very interesting approach. Haha.

Hanners said...

It's also concrete proof that you're made of plastic.

Wait, that sounds odd...

Glo said...

Number 7 was a good one (they were all pretty good). However, Baka Raptor wins in the end.

lolikitsune said...

lol... thanks for making my vote easier for me ;D

DonVincenzo said...

As Musashi said:


http://i691.photobucket.com/albums/vv280/sasword/getter15_musashi.jpg

Niels said...

10 PRINT "BAKA-RAPTOR SUCKS"
11 GOTO 10

ROFL! That kinda resembles my first ever program. You have my vote Hanners!

Hellomotto said...

"In the last round, I defeated ghostlightning. A ghost. Made of mother-fucking lightning."

That's intense shit. But Baka-Raptor managed to defeat a tsundere lesbian who favors bestiality rape. Which is even more intense.

Hanners said...

I'm pretty sure lightning would beat a lesbian in a straight fight.

Except I suppose it wouldn't be a "straight" fight, would it?

"The Swine Killer" said...

Dinosaur vs Androgynous, possibly lesbian writer.

I think that's a curbstomp battle right here.

Vote for a winner.

Anonymous said...

No hanner you're a fag

Anonymous said...

no hanners your a fag